Community & Discipleship
Honoring those who pass away (2 Sam 1:17-27)
David's lament for Saul and Jonathan teaches us to honor the dead by giving them respect, honor, thanks, and love, and the greatest way to honor them is to be ready for our own death.
Suffering reveals what is already in our hearts
Suffering does not create our character; it reveals it. Calm and sunny days make it easy to say that God is good all the time, but hard circumstances show the true depth of our faith. When we are shaken by sickness, loss, or death, what lies inside us comes to the surface. In the shock of hearing about the deaths of Saul and Jonathan, David's true colors shone forth. Through David we learn how to mourn, how to grieve, and how to love.
Loss is a time to give respect (19-21)
David calls Saul the glory of Israel, even though Saul had been an enemy to him and did not finish well. David honored the fact that Saul served the Lord for a season, because anyone who serves the Lord, even briefly, is worthy of respect. In verse 20 David tells Israel not to publish the news in Gath or Ashkelon, where the enemies would rejoice. Some people cannot respect our grief, and spending time with them can hurt. Careless words at a funeral can be remembered for years, so we should show love and practical care to the grieving.
Loss is a time to give honor (22-23)
David commends Saul and Jonathan for the battles they fought for the Lord in years past. Although Saul did not finish well, David chose to remember the good he did. Jonathan stayed faithful to his father until death, even knowing his father had sinned against God and against David. Like them, we should fight battles for the people we love, including the battle for holiness and purity, which releases a blessing over our children and our marriage. Billy Graham, holding his wife Ruth's hand near the end of their lives, said, we made it, pointing to a life of integrity worthy of honor.
Loss is a time to give thanks (24)
David calls the daughters of Israel to weep over Saul because Saul had clothed them in luxury, a reminder that a life can be a blessing to others. Grief was never meant to be carried alone, and the community of faith is called to weep with those who weep. Every life is a gift of God from the moment of conception. Even a baby who seems only to take blesses his family by his presence, so we should recapture the wonder of every life as a miracle and give thanks for it.
Loss is a time to give love (25-27)
David mourns Jonathan and says that Jonathan's love was extraordinary, surpassing the love of women. He shows how much he loved his lost friend, and it is good to speak to the departed, saying I love you and I miss you. Grieving people need love more than Bible verses. Show up, wash the dishes, bring meals, hold them, and say I am so sorry for your loss. Grief is normal and healthy, and we should not rush people to forget and move on.
The best way to honor the dead is to be ready for our own death
Every death sends a message to the living: we will all die one day. The greatest way to honor those who have passed away is to listen to that message and prepare for our own passing. We honor them by living a life that honors God, trusts Christ, and lives for him. Each of us will cross this finish line, moving from this temporary life into the eternal life with the Lord. The question that matters most is whether we are ready.
Apply to Life
- Let us allow ourselves and others to grieve, without rushing anyone to forget their loss.
- Let us think carefully before we speak to the grieving, and choose words of love over careless comments.
- Let us show up and serve grieving families with practical love, such as meals, help, and a loving presence.
- Let us give thanks to God for the lives of those we have lost and for the blessing they were to us.
- Let us fight the battles of holiness and faithfulness for the people we love, and prepare our hearts to be ready for our own passing into eternal life.
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